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Your foot fetish, explained!
For a while now I have been reading books on neuroscience. Though I am prone to brief obsessions with subjects of curiosity, my interest in the workings of the nervous system, and in particular the brain, has lasted longer than most. How do we think? A fundamental question to both philosophers and drunks alike, with neither reaching a particularly satisfactory outcome (then being able to remember it). You will be glad to know I haven’t come up with an answer. In fact, I haven’t even tried.
But we (by which I mean my academic superiors) have been able to make educated guesses, and to deduce some of our own inner workings, based on study and reasoning. Scientists have been making progress on this since the days of Da Vinci, and the then-outlawed practice of dissection. Recently, the subject has become considerably more accessible, with notable experts writing works on interesting areas within neuroscience, aimed not just at colleagues but the public at large. These are of interest from a scientific perspective. but also from the point of view of the anonymous patients, who are oft described at considerable depth by their physicians, as they adapt to the challenges of living with the side effects of accidents, fluke conditions, or neurodevelopmental disorders.
Neuroscience is for geeks, Doctors, and that
Balderdash. Neuroscience is defined as the study of the nervous system, including the brain, and logically, study of the (human) mind. Since we all have a brain, are we not all equipped to study it? Perhaps, since most of us haven’t had the privilege of attending medical school, with its associated cost and trials, we are unequipped for diagnosis and accurate evaluation. This, however, does not prevent us from making theories, suggesting ideas, and understanding much of what has already been written.
In fact several of the cases outlined in this post and in the titles mentioned, have formed episodes of the popular television series, House M.D. As a longtime fan of the series, I was particularly excited when a case study I recognised came up recently, especially since the writers embellished little for the public.
The man who mistook his wife for a hat
The bizarre title of an Oliver Sacks publication, this is just one of many neurological texts I have had the pleasure of reading recently. Although they tend to focus on the more extreme, weird cases, these non-fiction accounts of doctors’ experiences treating conditions, are nonetheless helpful to us in our everyday lives. With a better understanding of how the mind works, we can respond more fairly to the mood changes of a colleague, the mental difficulties faced by an amputee, or the outbursts of a Tourette’s sufferer, to name but a few.
This understanding may also apply to you too. Though the science has yet to be proven, I have found explanations for why we are able to come up with solutions to complex problems during dreams, or whilst performing mundane tasks. There are explanations for why we are more capable of recognising snakes than fast-moving vehicles, and why we prefer the sound of some words to others.
An anatomical explanation of the foot fetish?
Along the way of course, you may find out some interesting, if unverifiable, information. For example, when reading V. S. Ramachandran’s “Phantoms in the Brain” last year, I came across a ‘homunculus’ (little man) diagram which appeared to explain why some people experience foot fetishes. Apparently a prominent scientist, Wilder Penfield, discovered how sensation from certain parts of the body mapped to areas of the brain in the 1940s and 1950s. Using electrodes (placed on anesthetized humans rather than unwilling monkeys, somewhat against the trend), Penfield was able to locate a strip of brain real estate along which sensory perception was focused. Whilst most of these mappings were in logical order (hands next to thumbs, lips next to face), sensations from the genitalia were mapped right next to the feet, leading to the deduction that in some humans the two might be confused, leading to the titular foot fetish.
These, and many more interesting topics, are explored in laymans’ terms in Ramachandran’s Phantoms of the Brain, Oliver Sacks’ The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat and An Anthropologist On Mars, amongst other exceptional titles.
An Arkansas man identified as the “Toe Suck Fairy” was arrested Monday (Sept. 26) following a series of incidents in which he allegedly approached women in stores, commented on their feet and asked to suck their toes. According to Reuters, the culprit, Michael Robert Wyatt, 50, previously served a prison sentence for similar shenanigans. Last time, he even pretended to be a podiatrist in order to fondle and suck a woman’s toes at a clothing store.
Though criminal cases are rare, foot fetishism itself is surprisingly common. Academic studies on the prevalence and membership of fetish discussion groups have found that feet and foot accessories are the most fetishized of all non-genital body parts and objects. Nearly half of all such fetishes focus on feet, and almost two-thirds of fetishes for objects associated with the body are for shoes and socks. [Can Brain Scans Read People’s Minds? ]
Sigmund Freud claimed that people sexualize feet because they resemble penises. Today, a more scientific theory comes from the neuroscientist Vilanayar Ramachandran, director of the Center for Brain and Cognition at the University of California, San Diego.
Ramachandran said he solved the mystery of foot fetishes while studying the brain malfunctions that lead to phantom limb syndrome, a condition where amputees feel as if their missing limbs are still attached to their bodies, and that they can move those limbs. He found that the syndrome resulted when a person’s “body image map” the brain’s map of the body, in which different body parts are associated with and controlled by different brain regions failed to erase the part of the map that corresponded to the amputated limb.
In the case of some phantom foot patients, Ramachandran found that the amputees’ brains didn’t just fail to erase the missing foot from their body image map, they accidentally rewired the map in a way that caused the person’s phantom foot to become sexy. Phantom foot patients reported feeling sexual pleasure, and even orgasms , in their missing feet.
Long before Ramachandran began his work on phantom limb syndrome, it had been noted that the brain areas associated with genitalia and feet are adjacent to each other in the brain’s body image map. But no one else had put 2 and 2 together and realized that foot fetishes could possibly result from cross-wiring in the brain between the foot and the genital parts.
As Ramachandran wrote in “Phantoms in the Brain: Probing the Mysteries of the Human Mind” (Harper, 1999): “Maybe even many of us so-called normal people have a bit of cross-wiring, which would explain why we like to have our toes sucked.”
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You’d be surprised by how much of the population is into feet.
If you had to rank the sexiest body parts, “feet” may not be at the top of everyone’s list. But that’s the case for people with a foot fetish: they’re turned on by various aspects of feet, toes, and ankles.
A foot fetish can take various forms. Some people like licking and sniffing feet, whereas others prefer to massage them. There are folks who love when a foot is adorned in jewelry, such as an anklet or toe ring, and others prefer the “raw” foot, so to speak.
No matter what it is someone likes about feet, just know it’s completely healthy and normal. Having a foot fetish doesn’t make you weird, deviant, or destined to be alone. There are plenty of people who love having their feet touched, massaged, and worshipped, so you can absolutely find a partner who’s down to be on the receiving end as you explore your kink.
But what is it about feet, toes, and ankles that get some people aroused? Is it the smell? The taste? The feel? Perhaps there’s an element of submission and servitude that gets people with foot fetishes riled up?
While these are seemingly simple questions, there hasn’t been much research conducted on foot fetishes—or fetishes at all, for that matter. That’s why we reached out to Dr. Justin Lehmiller, research fellow at the Kinsey Institute and author Tell Me What You Want. While conducting research for his book, Lehmiller surveyed more than 4,000 Americans about their sexual fantasies. Among other things, he asked about fantasies pertaining to feet and toes. Here’s what Lehmiller learned from his research.
Why do some people have a foot fetish?
Fetishes—about feet or something else—are a “multi-sensory experience,” Lehmiller says: “Different people might find very different things arousing about their fetish object.”
“In the case of feet, it’s more about the visual aspect for some, but for others it may be about sniffing, licking, or otherwise touching feet, including using them during sexual penetration,” he says. “People may be interested in any combination of these activities, or any other activity in which feet are involved, including being stepped on or helping a partner take footwear on and off.”
John, 31, describes himself as having a “crazy foot fetish.” He says, “A lot of guys like the sweatiness and smell of feet. I definitely don’t. I like clean, dry feet. For me, it’s more about kneeling down in front of a dom—showing them a form of ‘Thank you’ for letting me be used,” he says.
George, 42, says he’s had a foot fetish for as long as he can remember. “I love the intimacy of touching someone’s feet. I like being able to massage them and make them feel good.”
How common are foot fetishes?
It’s hard to say exactly how common foot fetishes are, Lehmiller says. (According to Psychology Today, they’re among the most common sexual fetishes.)
“The best source I can cite would be the data I collected for my book Tell Me What You Want,” Lehmiller says. “I found that 14% of my participants reported having had a sexual fantasy before in which feet or toes played a prominent role.”
“It’s important to note that just because someone has fantasized about feet before doesn’t necessarily mean that they have a fetish for feet—just that they’ve been turned on by the idea of feet at least once,” he adds. “So while about 1 in 7 people reported having had a foot fantasy before, the number who have a true fetish for feet, in the sense of being primarily or only attracted to feet, is likely much smaller than that.”
Here’s the breakdown of how many people had fantasized about feet before, broken down into different groups:
- 5% of heterosexual women
- 18% of heterosexual men
- 11% of lesbian and bisexual women
- 21% of gay and bisexual men.
“So men and persons who identify as anything other than heterosexual are more likely to have fantasized about feet,” Lehmiller says.
What causes a foot fetish?
People develop fetishes for different reasons, “but they are largely thought to be learned behaviors,” Lehmiller says.
“For example, let’s say you have a partner who spontaneously stimulates your genitals with their feet, and this is something you’ve never experienced before,” he says. “Let’s also say that you happened to find it very pleasurable and had an intense orgasm. This could create positive reinforcement that would lead you to want to repeat the experience in the future, thereby laying the groundwork for a foot fetish.”
What are some of the biggest misconceptions about foot fetishes?
People wrongly assume that having a foot fetish means you have a mental disorder, Lehmiller says. Fetishes can become a problem—like if a person is distressed about their own fetish, or if they’re committing crimes in order to fulfill their desires—but for the most part, there’s nothing wrong with having very specific turn-ons when it comes to sex.
“Generally speaking, there’s nothing wrong with having a fetish,” Lehmiller says. “Fetishes don’t mean you have a mental problem or that you’re unable to establish healthy sexual or romantic relationships.”
Many men seem to have a foot fetish. This usually evolves during childhood or young puberty. It is most often the first sexual experience. Having a foot fetish is the most common fetish among all known fetishes.
Spiritual insights on foot worship
There is a very spiritual significance in having a foot fetish. When a man is yearning to worship the feet of a women, it actually represents the yearning to return to its original spiritual state. That was seen in archaeological terms as Goddess worship. Another name for this event, is called foot worship.
There is no other body part where people speak about worship. That was a big clue for me personally to investigate this ritual. And there is, however not so easy to find, a lot of extensional evidence about it.
The foot seems to be connected to the earth’s energy grid. In particular the ley lines of the earth’s energy grid. We find barefoot rituals all over the world but especially we see them carried out by Druids and Pagans when participating in their rituals.
When people have attention to the lower parts of a female body and are willing or have a yearning to worship those body parts, all this means is that they are very well in tune with the female divinity. The need to honor that female divine is helpful both for the practitioner and the practiced female. It is rather far from obscene or sick as many people would like to consider that practice. Knowing there are a lot of fetishes around. Most people are never strong enough to admit to their own fetish. Having a foot fetish is the most sacred fetish that a man can have. So everybody should eventually be very proud having that yearning to worship the feet of a women.
It’s been known for thousands and thousands of years that touching the female foot helps to receive blessings from the Goddess. And most important, that spiritual power and strength radiates from the soles of the women’s foot.
What we nowadays call foot worship is in fact a very ancient healing ritual and can be seen as an art. It was originally designed to raise the vibration of the women, and also for all population. Because we are in fact the physical embodiment of the souls governing the feminine divine.
The people who participate in foot worship are in fact participating in a very sacred spiritual ritual. This is why it is considered to be Goddess worship.
We are all spiritual manifestations in a physical shape. Nowadays we see the ritual in a more erotic way. It is therefore a very common activity during sexuality. While the true purpose of worshiping the feet of the women is actually to raise her and our vibration.
The reference to sexual practice
While the term actually gets confused or often goes hand to hand with being submissive. It has actually nothing to do with roles of dominance or submission. We can worship a women’s feet without being submissive.
Males are the expression of the male God and females are the expression of female Goddess. They both have divine energy inside. People with high vibration resonate that energy. When a man has the urge to worship a women’s feet, what this means is that they are completely in tune with the divine energy that resonates throughout the soles of that female.
That divine energy gets absorbed in the body throughout the soles of the foot. Which is probably the most important reason why certain males and females are drawn to the lower parts of the female divine. This energy nourishes the soles of the foot.
The same thing happens with used energy. When the energy is no longer needed, the soles of the foot will send it back to the earth.
The term foot fetish
Another problem and misconception is the fact that a foot can never be a fetish. Fetish is a word used by psychologist Freud to name certain non-sexual, non-body parts that awake sexual interest in certain people having that “fetish”. As the foot is a part of the body, it can never be a fetish. The legal term would be partialism.
We could go even further in this, we could say that foot is a wrong term as it should be considered a root. The foot is the root that binds us to the earth. So the root is the portal to this divine energy that is also connected to the divine energy of the earth.
Females who happen to have a very high vibration can help raise the vibration of the entire planet. When somebody worships those feet the vibration will yet raise.
The foot worshiping ritual can be seen as a honoring of the feminine divine that radiates in the women. Which will in turn send his vibration back to the earth.
The sweat of a women’s feet
Some men have a need to worship sweaty feet. Even that particular fact has a spiritual purpose. The sweat of high vibrating women have an extremely strong healing effect to the environment and to the people who worship the foot. The sweat is the healing substance that will resonate and radiate with her heart vibration until it finally becomes a part of the air we breathe.
A lot of people have the need to worship female soles and while this is considered part of a sexual practice. It’s spiritual meaning is far more profound than the sexual pleasure which often goes hand to hand with it.
In the ancient days, worshiping the foot of the Goddess was one of the most common practices during the pagan rituals. What is nowadays considered foot worship as part of a sexual experience is in fact Goddess worship designed to enlighten the people participating in that ritual.
This information has been suppressed for many thousands of years since the last takeover of our planet. Our belief system is designed to suppress the feminine divine because it is a very big threat of the dominating masculine power. Which, when divine feminine and masculine power is in balance in a certain individual, would lose their domination over this planet.
Therefore we have to say that the feminist manifestations and feminist cults nowadays are not a manifestation of feminine divine. It is the same dominating masculine energy that poisons our planet. Feminist women are women who are not in tune with the feminine divine. Our society nowadays promotes so kind of manifestations because it leds people further and further from the truth.
Did you ever think about why different cultures see different bodily features as “sexy”, and some don’t?
Did you ever think about why in some uncontacted tribes, people walk around naked (or almost naked) and there’s nothing sexy about that?
Did you ever think about why in some Muslim societies, hearing a woman’s singing is practically a sin because it’s too sexy?
Did you ever think about why some people think that seeing a lady’s pubic hair is highly erotic and arousing, whereas some other people are actually only turned on by a smooth, hairless pubic area?
There are countless examples of how culture, time, and personal taste shift and change whenever it comes to what is perceived to be sexually appealing.
Have you ever wondered why?
The answer is actually quite simple.
In her book Come as you Are, Emily Nagosky describes an experiment done on male rats, where they made the rats associate the smell of lemons with sexual activity. These rats were “turned on” sexually whenever the smell of lemons was present.
Our human experience is not too far off.
If, while we’re growing up, we learn that looking at a female’s elbow in public is not a socially excepted thing to do, and while we do so, we start feeling some new, unfamiliar sensations of arousal, we learn to associate women’s elbows with sexual arousal. Cut “elbow” and paste any other body part (“breasts”; “ankle”; “nipple”; “foot”; “hair” etc) into the last sentence to arrive with the body part that is considered arousing in a specific society.
Of course, there is an innate component — the part where, as children, we touch and explore our bodies and we notice how different areas of our body feel different to touch. But enjoying the sensations that our body produces, is not perceived as “sexy” as such until concepts of what sexuality is are forming in our mind.
Same goes for whatever is considered “kinks” or “fetishes”.
These are simply associations that at some stage of someone’s sexual development, found themselves attached to a sexual relevant activity. It’s also true for your plain-ole fantasies. Perhaps you might feel ashamed or embarrassed to expose and to let anyone know what they are, because they deviate so enormously from what we judge a healthy sexual experience to be. It’s understandable that we feel uncomfortable when our fantasies are so far removed from what our judging mind sees as constructive and “right”.
But there is still nothing morally wrong with being sexually excited when you think about your not-so-socially accepted fantasy, as opposed to when you think about a fantasy that is considered more socially acceptable. Being sexually aroused when a guy sees a female’s nipple is considered normal, but when he sees a foot — this is considered to be a fetish. One is socially accepted, the other not as accepted, that’s all.
We need to remind ourselves that fantasies are arousing because of something in our psyche that conditioned us to associate one taboo subject (namely, anything that is “wrong”) with another (AKA sex, which is still mostly taboo in our society).
When we strip sexual arousal back to the pure enjoyment, back to the sensations of pleasure that are present in our body while we’re engaged in a sexual activity, we bring some of that innocence that we had as children exploring our bodies. When pleasurable sensations in our body are the guides that we follow on the path of pleasurable experiences (as opposed to trying to achieve some future orgasmic goal — which is a very basic form of fantasy), we may be surprised to discover that what turns us on — or perhaps, what we thought “should” turn us on — loses some of its intensity. Some of our kinks, fetishes, and fantasies might gradually lose their grip when we focus our sexual drive on pure bodily sensations. What we learned to associate with sexuality seems to slowly fade, when our attention is drawn back to the innocence of pleasure.
My own experience shows that the more I practice sex in a mindful, moment-to-moment awareness state-of-being, the more my old fantasies stopped being so arousing or exciting. It was a gradual shift, which I only noticed after years of practicing mindful sex, and it was not done intentionally — but it happened nonetheless.
Not that there’s anything wrong if the same fantasies are still prevailing, as long as we practice them with awareness, and no one is hurt by them. Once we understand their origin has nothing to do with who we are now, and where they stem from, it is easier for us to accept that part of us, that might not fully gel with our conscious, loving being that we want to think of ourselves as.
It makes more sense to practice sex in a way that truly excites us, that truly responds to our internal “yes!”, than to practice sex in a way that is done “right” but might not be as enjoyable.
Every Guy With a Foot Fetish Dreams of This Experience
Did you ever play “Never Have I Ever” in college? Here are the rules: Everyone puts up ten fingers, and you go around in a circle and one by one share something that you’ve never done (and as human nature goes, the experiences shared are usually sexual). If you’ve done it, you have to put one finger down, and of course, drink. The first person to put all 10 fingers down loses or wins, depending on how you look at it.
One day we all have to become grown-ups, but that doesn’t mean we have to stop playing Never Have I Ever, or better yet — checking things off your bucket list. AskMen is still playing, and the rules are simple: In each edition of this column, we speak to someone about something they’ve always wanted to try in bed. They tell us about the fantasy, and why it turns them on. Then, they actually do it, and we get the lowdown on how the experience matched the fantasy.
What’s the first thing you think of when someone uses the word “fetish”?
Foot fetishes are incredibly common, and according to this, nearly half of all fetishes around non-erogenous body parts involve feet. Such predilections can take many forms, from a desire to worship a partner’s foot, to an interest in footjobs, in which one partner uses their feet and toes to massage the other partner’s penis — like a foot-based handjob.
*Peter, a 52-year-old entrepreneur in the cannabis space, has a foot fetish. He especially enjoys nylons and pantyhose, and has since he was a child. While women’s feet cloaked in stockings visited him in dreams as a kid, at this point in his life, he gets to enjoy them in the real world — by getting footjobs from enthusiastic partners.
We asked Peter about his kink origin story, his first footjob and advice for those curious about receiving one.
AskMen: Tell us a little bit about your sexuality.
Peter: I have always had a fondness of women’s feet from a sexual point of view, for as long as I can remember.
I remember having dreams of being very subservient to older women’s nylon feet in my parents’ living room. I just remember simply worshipping these women. I never saw their faces or anything, but just that they were sitting on our couch in the living room with pantyhose on. They were fully dressed but had no shoes.
I remember just being so enamored and enraptured to be touching and experiencing them. There was no sexual element, except the recollection that I felt these were the presence of very strong females. It was a little threatening yet arousing.
A little fear is definitely a turn-on, isn’t it?
Yes. So I discovered when I was young that my predilections to this really seem to favor nylons and pantyhose. I had other interesting dreams that were about domination. I found that I started to dream of animate women’s pantyhose, pinning me down and doing things like tickling me. Again, with no real sexual element to it.
Then it evolved. Once I became sexually aware of my own self, the dreams did escalate periodically. They involved these disembodied women’s legs. It was nothing weird or gory, it was as if a pair of pantyhose just popped out of the package and animated themselves. Again, it was all a dominant experience with me at their mercy.
What happened when you grew up? How did you turn these fantasies into a reality?
I’m not going to hide it from a partner. Yes, I love to engage with their feet during sex. I love to do different things in terms of foreplay; engaging with my partner’s feet is a really good form of foreplay. That’s often when the footjob would come in with the stroking, but not just on my penis. It wasn’t just about stroking my erection, it was about being completely in the experience.
So it’s not just about toes wrapped around your dick? It seems to be way more complicated than that.
That’s just one part of it. It’s the joy of feeling dominated by a powerful female presence. I’ve been fortunate that my partners have all been powerful female presences in their own right. That can make for quite remarkable experiences (and willingness) on their partners, too.
As kinks don’t tend to go away, it’s crucial to find a partner you can express them with. What’s your memory of receiving your first footjob?
It was with one of my past partners. We were exploring and she was indulging me in my fetish, and we were shooting Polaroids in pantyhose in our unfinished basement. We spent like half an hour just playing and taking pictures. Not outright foreplay, but just more, and more and more arousal. After about half an hour, I ended up being so aroused that I wanted to stroke myself against the nylon fabric, and that’s when I laid down and she wrapped her feet around me — and it was really quite remarkable.
How has your experience with foot fetishes evolved since that first time?
It’s gotten better. About two years ago, my partner and I rented a beautiful dungeon and had a lot of fun exploring it. I had experienced light bondage at home, but that environment was fantastic. It had cages, it had a cross, it had a bench and stocks and everything. My partner took joy in doing what she did with me, and that evolved to footjobs, foot play and a lot of very sensual exploration with her feet.
Can you give advice to someone with this desire who hasn’t acted on it yet?
Move beyond any self-judgment that there is. Embrace who you are. I can’t deny or suppress this; it is me. I brought it into every relationship in the sense that that’s what lovemaking and sexual expression is all about. Sharing my self with partners has always been an accepting experience.
Taking a deep breath, you know that this moment is pivotal. You could easily allow Tora to blackmail you, to dominate you and to bleed you dry, However, you have a moment of clarity where you realise that you don't have to go down that part.
"Yes, you're right. I do have a foot fetish. Big deal. Just because I like feet does not mean that you have the right to blackmail me. So, is there anything else you have to say?"
You say this challengingly, knowing that this surely must be the best way to deal with your ex girlfriend. She takes several moments to reply.
"So it's not a big deal then? You don't mind me putting out a few bits of information about you on Social Media? Your 'girlfriend' won't mind me doing that either, will she?"
There's a gloating edge to her voice, one that infuriates you!
"You can do what you like. You're not getting a dime out of me."
Putting the phone down, you decide to call Lizzie before Tora can get any messages out there on Twitter, Facebook or anywhere else online. "Hi, Lizzie. Yeah. I need to tell you something. " You 'fess up about your fetish to Lizzie, apologising that you didn't inform her sooner.
She's sweet and understanding about it all, which makes you realise you should have told her this before! She does seem curious as to why you're telling her now though. Admitting that it's because your ex, Tora, seems to have found out, she is again, totally on your side!
Because you stood up to her, Tora seems to have realised that you're not going to play her game. She refrains from posting anything online, though she does send you enticing messages occasionally. One had a photo of her bare soles and kiss emojis on them; it took a great deal of self-restraint not to go over to hers, with your tail between your legs, and to beg her to worship her feet!
Lizzie indulges you with your love for feet, allowing you to lick her feet, suck her toes and massage them to your heart's content. They are admittedly not in the same league as your ex girlfriend's, but you get used to them. Lizzie is patient with you and doesn't seem to mind you exploring your fetish with you in the slightest!
As long as you stay strong and don't surrender to Tora, which is always a possibility, then you have nothing to be ashamed of or worry about!
If you’re a women who has ever worn sandals, heels or any type of shoe which exposes your toes, there’s every chance you would have been eyed up. Just not where you were expecting.
Many people can be squeamish about a foot fetish, and I’m not sure why. Is it yet another part of our body we’re supposed to be ashamed of? Personally I like my feet, they get me to all sorts of places.
Other people have sensitive feet, and don’t like them being touched. That’s fine, they can still be admired in a myriad of ways.
The basic fact of the matter is that foot fetishes are incredibly common. It’s one of the basic moves in Domination – when someone is made to do something so degrading and disgusting as licking your feet then that’s when they feel at their most submissive.
If you suspect that your partner has a foot fetish, then I have a few tips to get you started. One quick caveat – yes, there are female foot fetishists out there, but for ease I’m coming very much from the angle of a straight woman playing with a man.
(If you’re still not too sure about trying any of these then just look on the bright side – chances are you’ve already been a participant!)
Domination isn’t about whips and chains. It’s about one partner pleasing the other, so a daily foot massage on the couch could definitely become part of your routine – isn’t that great!?
And if you’re worried about cracked heels or funky nails, make that part of it. Get him to buy the cream, pedicure set… and if he’s a good boy he might even be allowed to paint your toenails.
Don’t get self conscious about your feet – make it his job to perfect them.
In this case one size does not fit all. Some people are into sandals, some into heels, others into stilettos, some people just love feet in the nip.
Find out what your partner likes, but also experiment for yourself – what do you enjoy wearing? What makes you feel powerful and sexy?
You don’t even have to be able to walk in them. I have a giant pair of stilettos that I love, but can only wear sitting down – which definitely doesn’t stop the fun!
My only recommendation is you need something that’s patent.
To put it bluntly, make sure they’re ‘wipe clean’.
I would start a typical Domination session by getting the sub to lick my shoes. I’d make him go over the shoe with his tongue before finally sucking the heel in a tease before taking my shoes off and allowing him to lick my feet proper.
But there’s more that you can do if he’s really into your sexy soles.
Make him lie on his back, and suck off each of your toes one by one. Tell him you want his tongue to go around each toe, in and out the of gabs between and finally push as many as you can into his mouth to see how much he can take.
Run your toes down his body (Don’t be afraid to sit down. Better than toppling over into the wardrobe, as I’ve learnt from bitter experience), dig your toes into his nipples even. But keep coming back to making him lick and kiss your delicate tootsies.
It’s a real thing. Place the penis between the arches of your feet and… have at it. This doesn’t work for everyone as your feet are obviously not as dexterous as your hands, but a lot of foot lovers will dig it.
There’s many ways you can try – I think it’s just having a peen on a foot that’s the excitement, so go with whatever you find comfortable.
(I always added an extra element by saying that if they happened to get my feet ‘messy’, they’d have to lick it up afterwards. But maybe that’s more for the intermediate lesson.)
Bend him over and wear him like a sock.
How many toes you can fit in is up to you and your lubricant.
I’m also lead to believe that ‘Toeing’ is the female equivalent of a foot job – i.e rubbing your toes against her clitoris.
Admittedly, that escalated quickly.
But don’t worry, it’s rarely reciprocal. Just because they want to play with your paws does not mean you’re obliged to start messing around with their hooves. Not at all!
Some of these choices might seem a bit extreme – that’s where communication comes in. Just because your partner likes your feet it doesn’t mean they have en extreme foot fetish. It could just mean they like them as a cute, curvy extension of you
Some men, however, will have spent that whole tube journey imagining your feet in their mouth. So always best to check where on the scale your own little foot-lover lies.
At the end of the day, liking feet is not weird or unusual. It can actually be quite hot. It’s intimate, sensual, and is one of the rare breeds of fetishes where there doesn’t have to be any fussy equipment or positions.
Instead, you can both enjoy a foot massage on the sofa whilst watching Netflix. Easy.
Listen to our podcast Good Sex Bad Sex
If you liked this story you should give our new sex podcast Good Sex Bad Sex a listen – it’s out every Wednesday.
The show is available now on iTunes here and on Soundcloud here.
Metro bloggers Miranda Kane and Bibi Lynch co-host the show, chatting to a different guest about all things sex and relationships each week.
U.S. Coast Guard officials announced they may have found the source of the oil pipe leak, which spewed an estimated 144,000 gallons of crude oil along Orange County’s coastline.
OC Oil Spill
- Authorities now estimate a spill size range between 25,000 gallons to a maximum of 131,000 gallons
- 5,544 gallons of oily water retrieved
- Approximately 172,500 pounds of oily debris has been recovered from shorelines
- 14,060 feet of boom laid to try to curb oil spread
- More than 900 people on the ground in cleanup effort
- General questions: 714-374-1702
- Do not approach affected wildlife, call in a report: 877-823-6926
- Assist with animals: 714-374-5587
- Help with cleanups: 714-374-1702
- File a claim: 866-985-8366
“Upon further investigation we determined that approximately 4,000 feet (of the pipeline) … has been displaced and has laterally been displaced by 105 feet,” said Coast Guard Cpt. Rebecca Ore
Amplify President and CEO Martyn Willsher, who runs the oil platform, said “we take responsibility for all of it … we are the party that owns that pipeline and we will continue to be responsible [for clean up efforts].”
“The pipeline has essentially been pulled like a bow string,” Willsher said. “So it kind of is in a semicircle.”
Officials also clarified confusion about whether the company’s divers would be examining the pipe.
“Divers were sent down, these are commercially procured divers were sent down to assess that pipeline,” Ore said, adding that the divers were a third party procured by the unified command.
Gov. Gavin Newsom is expected to visit Orange County at 3 p.m. and is expected to meet with reporters.
At an earlier news conference on Monday at the unified command center, Willsher said a boat anchor was one of many possible causes of the pipeline rupture, but then didn’t offer further details about the speculation on Tuesday, saying it was too early to know.
According to a March report from the Government Accountability Office, oil pipelines in the Pacific Ocean have been outfitted with sensors that are supposed to detect leaks by notifying company and government officials about a drop in pressure.
But it’s unclear if those sensors worked on the ruptured pipeline, which runs from Long Beach to an oil rig off the coast of Huntington Beach.
“There is a leak detection system [in the pipe] and we will turn over all that information to authorities,” said Willsher.
He refused to answer press questions about if the oil pipe sensor was working or not — or if anyone on the platform was notified.
Meanwhile, Ore said they often receive visual reports from boaters about oil sheens on the water.
“Our standard reporting procedures are to contact the reporting source,” Ore said. “In this case the reporting source did not provide us with additional information to characterize the sheen.”
The Orange County oil spill was first widely reported Saturday, Oct. 2. Questions remain around how and when the spill started.
Officials say they have shut down the pipeline and no more oil is leaking.
The cleanup is being handled by a task force led by the US Coast Guard, along with the California Department of Fish and Wildlife and Amplify Energy, the operator of the burst pipeline.
The cities of Long Beach, Newport Beach and Huntington Beach are also assisting.
There is no set timeframe on when beaches will reopen, with Huntington Beach Mayor Kim Carr saying she’s heard “a few weeks to a few months.” No one from the task force has commented on when beaches will reopen or how long the recovery effort will take.